Memoria
by Inept
Summary: One shot: This story basically takes place in the thoughts of Kikyou after Inuyasha left her. Review please!


_Chapter One: _How long is forever?

_Disclaimer: _I don't own Inuyasha, though not many of the characters really stand out in this fiction.

**_A/N:_** This story might be a one shot, I haven't decided yet. It just depends where it goes.

* * *

Once upon a time… a long time ago… Usually the most beautiful and happy stories begin this way. I guess my story used to be beautiful, maybe even happy, but all that is gone now. Shattered hearts don't last long in a little girl's fantasy. My life may have been a fairy tale at one time, but it certainly isn't today. Maybe it was back during the time where your voice made me smile, and your encouragement made me whole, made me the person I am. The person who I was that long time ago. The person I took for granted. I guess I used to know what love was, that long time ago. Knew it when you looked into my eyes, felt it when you held me in your arms. I know our love is gone now. I feel it in your caresses, ones that used to be full of warmth. Now they leave nothing but ice, reaching through my skin and gripping my heart. I hear it in the way you speak. Once your words were of dreams, of the future. Now they contain nothing, your words empty as my soul.

You're moving on. Your expression says it all. Especially when you talk to her. You never were very good with hiding the way you felt. I could always see what you really thought. Even now, with everything changing, there is nothing you can hide from me.

I know that I am not your future. I think I might have known from the first day. The first day... Those words bring back memories… I remember when you first pulled me into your embrace. I remember the first time we kissed. I remember the first time you let me down. I remember the day you broke my heart.

Maybe she'll have what you're looking for. Maybe not. Maybe all you really needed was me. I smile to myself at this thought. How can I lie to myself like this? We both know by now that she's perfect for you. Sure, you don't always get along, you aren't always the best of friends, and you defiantly don't say the right things all the time, but you love each other. That's all that matters, isn't it? Love is forever.

Our case wasn't a good example of love. I'm not sure what you could call us. Lovers sounds too strong a word for the type of partners we were. Looking back on it, I realize that it probably wasn't even love to you. You needed me. Not necessarily me, just someone. Anyone. We were both lost souls. I just didn't know how lost I was. I took it upon myself to help you, to fix you. In return, you fixed me. I don't think you even realize how much you've affected me, even to this day. Some days I can't get over how happy I am to have met you, while other days I can't believe I've lost you.

I guess people really do change. I was so ignorant back then, thinking what we had would stay that way forever. Sometimes people meet in the right time, and things work. Your love with her works, it's strong. I can see it in the way you look at her when she's not watching, a look for of love and pride. Its love that transcends time. Some nights I wonder if you ever looked at me like that. There is still something deep inside of me that believes so, something inside me that needs to believe that. I think our love was a once in a lifetime thing for me. Sure, you'll go on and do great things, meet great people, but I'll never be able to get over you, forever wrapped in the reverie of your touch.

I'm damned, Inuyasha, and it makes no difference whether I believe in damnation or not. The only thing that really matters is if damnation believes in you.

**_A/N:_** I've finished… eeks. That's different then I'd thought it would turn out like. Tell me if you like it or not. Oh yeah, and I got the idea for the last line from the play The Island of Doctor Moreau written by Troy Traddup.

In case you couldn't figure it out, Kikyou was the narrator, and Kagome was the other girl. Oh yeah, and in case you didn't notice the Inuyasha part, Inuyasha was the guy. It's a bit OOC, but it sort of tells what I wanted it to.


End file.
